Mirror & Mind

Posted: March 29, 2015 in Art, Philosophy, Poetry

a_mind_of_a_crazy_man_by_nocnadama-d72yswyArt by NocnaDama


Within this journey of affliction

self-doubt & self-hate

the barriers and walls of rejection

entitlements & quick money

there is a stop sign.


If you can read

understand color then one must stop

to not stop is the redundancy of mistakes

you call me crazy

you are insane.


Presence can only pretend for so long

unveil your mask

let me see your face

of hate

show yourself.


For your faith

only until then

the light will reveal

& shine on you.




I cry

Posted: March 20, 2015 in Poetry

65_Tears of blood_unknown

For the wars in the world
the pain that I can’t visit countries
I dreamt of as a child.

Because my American dream
is a slavery nightmare
and I am still not free

I cry—
I cry—
I cry—

Because my friends/family died
they kill themselves
by choice or arrogance.

The hate took them away
their addiction made monsters
bigotry is a murderer.

These salty waterfalls
preach the story of my lifetime
I document my pain.

We have become animals
no moral, civility or compassion
our leaders fail us.

I cry—
I cry—
I cry—

The pain of a mother losing her only child
restless animal before a storm
what’s happening?

How dare I complain?
when others have it worse
but it’s their fault.

Mothers & daughters
turn into meat
zombies by predators.

Our men turned to beast
our women weak
our children lost.

So…I just cry
for my dead mother
ancestors & unknown father.

I cry—
I cry—
I cry—

My Views on Parenting

Posted: March 19, 2015 in Let's Talk

Working with foster, homeless, sometimes abused children, never knowing my father & my personal experiences has drawn my conclusion. It’s a moral thing.

It is very difficult for me to respect any parent that does not stay, live & physical raise their flesh & blood that they brought into the world.

I believe it to be the most selfish & irresponsible thing a human could do because they are doing it to their helpless self.

If a man could abandon his seed then abandoning a woman, anything at all is easy breeze. If a woman could abandon the human she carried & brought into the world I am at a loss for words.

No money woes, no argument, no fun, no other lover & no drugs should come before taking responsibility for the life you brought into the world.

I don’t care if you were too young, if you can’t take care of it or if it was an accident. There is no accident with the conception of a child. Sex between a man & a woman makes babies.

When one becomes a parent they are no longer a child. Their sole responsible is to raise the child they gave life to. Not their grandparents, family members, one parent, strangers or the government. Figure it out.

I find that in many cases it is a generational thing. Your dad abandoned you, you abandon your child and the cycle goes on.

To me, that single decision tells the tale of that person’s character & self-pride. It will be hard to build my trust. I judge that just like how I judge a person that drops a cigarette or trash at their feet. Writes a bad check, neglect paying back things they borrowed, or just taking what is not theirs.

I know businesses that will not hire a man if he is not married with a family. They claim your home life is just as your credit & criminal record. It shows responsibility, loyalty & commitment.

Someone Died Last night

Posted: February 25, 2015 in Uncategorized

Someone Died Last night

When we think of death we think of Grandpa,
we think of Grandma, or an old fart.
But when a young soul
or a strong force
just disappears
it awakens—

I wish I could tell though I try to—
dispel the curse
of death. To preach life—
though I too will die.
I can’t help but cry.

So I retreat in grief for the voice
I heard yesterday that is gone today.

People are asking me what I think about the Marine veteran that got convicted for killing the other veteran (Chris Kyle). Wrong is wrong he should go to jail.

• I hate when veterans use PTSD as an excuse to be a loser, a killer and & a slacker
• There are terrible civilians, terrible active military & terrible veterans like everybody else (people are people)
• When a veteran is embarrassing it perpetuates the stereotype of all veterans being crazy
• It is a very minute percentage of veterans that have PTSD
• These people join the military already losers
• There are veterans that are really ill & they do not commit murder or crimes
• I know many veterans, PTSD veterans would rather commit suicide that homicide
• I am a successful, healthy & happy veteran
• I know hundreds of veterans that served well, are educated & live normal productive happy successful lives
• As far as Chris Kyle I believe that he had a job to do, but there is a military code that one does glorify their kills & duties that they performed in the military
• When veterans start to glorify killing Bin Laden & how many sniper kills they did during a war, it is no longer about the greater good, you are no longer a hero but a narcissist
• So good, go to jail for murder, be an example for the veterans that use war illnesses to be a criminal, addict & failure
• I am tired of loser veterans giving the good veterans a bad name

So as to not let my friends get on the ignorant train about veterans, only 10% of specifically “war veterans” have PTSD, 5% of which are faking it. Those people were already messed up before they joined the military.
Another 80% of veterans are outstanding federal workers, contractors, doctors, firemen, policemen, lawyers, teachers, head of businesses, entrepreneurs and the list goes on, they are very successful, healthy & happy.

I don’t strip
I am not a hooker
I don’t speak Ebonics
I don’t dress like a slut
I don’t glorify & have a huge butt
& I don’t twerk

I don’t have a bunch of kids/baby daddies (I have none)
I don’t sleep around
I don’t need a man to save me
I don’t point my finger
I don’t do duck face
& I don’t bop my head
I don’t preach God
I have never been on welfare
Never lived in the projects
I have very good manners

I listen to alternative rock
I paint
I write/read poetry
I write fantasy & serial killer scripts
I read books
I ride horses
I fish
I boat
Love water sports
I swim (a lot)
I am educated
I am well-travelled
I practice French
I am well cultured
I garden/cook/clean
I have a sophisticated palate
I do charity work
I hate violence
I hate arguing/confrontation
I am a trained military marksman
I practice Tai Chi
I prefer British Standard English

I like having long red hair
I love my gays
I love dolling myself up
I love sushi
Fruits & vegetables
I like the theatre
I enjoy Art galleries
I know fine things
I live a quiet country life
I lived in three countries
I can manage money
& yes I own property
I don’t play sports
I can’t dance

My friends are very diverse
So get over your ignorant, racist stereotyping bigotry
Everyone one is different, especially me
I am confident & I love myself

I am so sick & tired of people trying to get my attention by talking about Scandal & Beyoncé.
If you are not Black, a minority woman & glorifying them to me it sickens me.
I seriously stopped talking to people because of that.

It is not about feminism, not about fake hair nor makeup, and NO I am not jealous.
Have you seen me in person? I love glorious hair & makeup, they have been around for centuries & it’s not a Black thing.

My argument is merely about perpetuating the stereotype of Black women from slavery days. Historically, Black women were victimized as being sexual hedonist seducing men & their slave masters. It’s about Black women not having brains and gallivanting their bodies.

As for as Beyoncé; I think she is illiterate. She does not contribute her wealth towards young minority women & girls. I don’t see her campaigning for schools & education. I don’t think a woman over thirty with children especially daughters should display her private parts in public. Her music has no substance to me.

Scandal: I am grateful for Black screenwriters & Black leading ladies. The thing is, sleeping with any married man is disgusting, especially in his house, especially a White man as a Black woman. Typical slave scenarios, when will he marry her? Scandal is very cliché because of the juxtaposition of educated Black woman & sleeping around.

I will not even talk about Nicki Minaj & when I do, I am being satirical.

There I said it!